Scene 1
Ext. Gerudo Fortress. Day. Two Gerudo guards are sitting on crates, leaning on their spears. They look bored.
Iz: So, anything happen while you were patrolling, Nazbooru?
Naz: (yawns) Nope. Oh - I dropped my spear, and had to stop to pick it
up. And then I had to clean the sand off.
Iz: Anything *interesting*?
Naz: Nothing interesting ever happens in Gerudo Valley, Iz. 'Bout the
most thrilling it gets is when the wind changes 'round the River of
Sand, and whoever's on sentry duty gets sand in their face.
Iz: Yeah, remember when Shezbooru was having an ice-cream on duty, and
it ended up coated in sand? (pause) Okay, maybe that wasn't *that*
funny.
A whistle is heard from inside the fortress. Iz gets to her feet.
Iz: That's Kezbooru calling guard change. I'd better be off.
Naz: See you later... oh yeah, I have guard duty too. Bye!
Iz moves off towards the training ground, while Naz stands up and moves off towards the big rock.
Scene 2
Ext. Gerudo Fortress. Day. Iz and Naz are again sitting on the crates. Both look bored, though less than last time.
Naz: At last, something actually *happened* in this damn valley. It's hard to believe...
Yelling can be heard off to the left - along the lines of "Let me out! I need to find the sixth Sage!"
Iz: Shut UP! You came in here, you STAY THERE! (sighs with annoyance)
Men! Honestly!
Naz: I know. They all seem to have serious hormonal problems - and I
guess his sword (she nods in the direction of the prison) doesn't
help much with that.
They both start laughing.
Iz: Well, you know what they say about guys with swords that long. I
mean, five feet is excessive - is he trying to compensate for
something?
Naz: Do they *all* have that problem? There must be at least one guy
who doesn't...
The chatting is rudely interrupted by a 'whoosh-clang', and then both of them turn to face the prison.
Iz: Oh, great, now we have an escaped prisoner to deal with. I suppose it's back to guard duty...
Both of them run indoors as quietly as possible.
Scene 3
Ext. Gerudo Fortress. Evening. Iz and Naz are back on the crates. Both of them look slightly annoyed, but at least they're not bored. Iz has a black eye, while Naz has a shallow, but not serious, cut on her arm - it's been bandaged.
Iz: Okay, I take back what I said about his sword. That thing *hurts*.
Naz: You were lucky. This cut's gonna take about a week to heal.
(shrugs) At least he kept the damn thing *clean*, or my arm
would've swollen up by now. Sunburn, and now this... my week's not
been good.
Iz: We should've kept those carpenters in the Colossus. He couldn't
have found them then. (feels around in her back pocket) Oh great.
Dropped my key.
Naz: (checks quickly) Me too.
Iz: (sighs with annoyance) Wonderful. So those carpenters are loose.
Naz: Yeah, well, what can they do? Prance around and make the others
laugh so hard they faint?
Iz: I know, but it's still damn irritating. First time a guy ever beat
me in a fight...
Naz: He's the only guy you've ever fought.
Iz: I know, but a guy in a *dress*? You can't tell me that you can wear
a tunic and still be...
Naz: ...More masculine than a carpenter?
Iz: Exactly. And what is the deal with his hat? Never seen anything
like *that* before. You know what I think? He's...
Whatever "he" might be, it is interrupted by a sequence of whistles - two short, three long, two short, one long. Iz stands up.
Iz: "Call to order"? Why's Kez calling that? You don't think...
Naz: I don't know. I mean, Nabooru wouldn't let someone like that join.
I mean... he's *male*.
Iz: Well, maybe he impressed her so much with his ass-whupping skills
that she had to let him join.
Naz: Maybe. I suppose... he did beat *you* pretty soundly.
Iz: Yeah, and you as well. (shrugs) Better go inside then. If we don't
want to get screamed at by Nabooru.
Naz nods, and stands up. They both walk fairly quickly inside.
Scene 4
Ext. Gerudo Fortress. Before dawn, a few days later. Naz and Iz are - yet again - sitting on those crates. Iz's black eye is less visible, and Naz's bandages are off. Iz is smirking.
Iz: So, did you hear?
Naz: About what?
Iz: Green-dress-guy got into the Colossus. I was there when they
reported the news, and so was leader girl herself.
Naz: Nabooru? What did she say?
Iz: Oh, nothing, but she sorta smiled. For a moment, at least.
Naz: You sure?
Iz: Totally. (pause) You ask me - I'd say she fancies him. And not just
for that sword.
Naz: And you know what they say about guys with big swords...
They both start laughing. Quickly cut to credits....
CREDITS
Starring...
Also Starring (well, mentioning)
Written by Izbooru
Produced by Izbooru
Directed by Izbooru
With thanks to: Shigeru Miyamoto, for making the Greatest Game Ever (TM).
Last edited on 11:34 08/07/01 by Izbooru. Shigeru Miyamoto deserves all the credit for making Zelda such an excellent game. (But the random Gerudo warriors in this story are our invention.)